“We grow, regress, get stuck, fragment, hide, and find ourselves over and over again.” – Audrey Stephenson, Psychotherapist.
Learn!
Dear Ones,
Today’s readings and my own writing are themselves fragments struggling to find growth. I began by looking at my query status on Query Tracker. Added another rejection to the list. Okay. Next I wrote a short chapter in a new manuscript, one that I do not love in the way that I love the finished one I haven’t found an agent for. It’s hard to fall in love with a new manuscript sometimes. For me, anyway. I am sentimental, perhaps.
To escape, I ventured outside to the laundry room, which is separated from the main house by only a few feet, thinking I would do some productive laundry readying for my work week which begins tomorrow, Tuesday, which is quite wonderful right?–not on Monday, dreaded Monday–but on Tuesday, which I have to be grateful for. And I am. So, a little laundry, and then back to writing, I thought. Until I spotted the giant bug on the laundry room door. Yes, the Mormon crickets are still upon us here. Clearly a sign not to do the laundry.
Then I wrote in long hand–natural left-handed cursive usually brings me back to myself. Maybe even always when I spend enough time there. Today’s topic in my guided journal was Soul Searching: The quest to unlock one’s true self is an ongoing process, because we’re changing all the time (Breathe Journal, c2023. Guild of Master craftsman Publiscations Ltd. http://www.breathemagazine.co.uk. 72-3). Here are two of the prompts given in the journal and my responses:
- *Observe every aspect of your surroundings–from the bed you sleep in, to the transport you use. Things around you can shine a light on how you interact with your environment and indicate what you believe about yourself. What do you notice?
Sue’s pillow
Me: My bed must be clean and bright, soft and matchy-matchy- and made! Looking around me: Polished wood. Sunlight. Windows. Plants. Crystal. Books. Lois’s quilt. Photos. Art. Candles. Sue’s pillow. Baskets. Listening to music…
Lois’s quilt
(After I finished, I noticed I didn’t observe “the transport” I use. I could take a picture of my feet, which is what I try to use the most, but we don’t have a mani-pedi salon in Austin. Then I thought of my dear Jeep, Joni Blue. She’s not new, but she’s paid for, and she’s taken us to many beautiful places. She’s currently outside with the crickets, so I will not be going outside to take her picture.)
2. *Breathe. You will be astonished by how often you hold your breath. Just notice. Drop your shoulders, stretch your neck, allow your abdomen to soften. Breathe. Notice what comes up as you come back to yourself and jot down any thoughts.
Me: This is one of the best gifts I learned way back in Lamaze childbirth class and years later in yoga–the magic loosening and lightening of the body and mind through the breath. Surpisingly, I still forget to practice it, often until I am panicked. I need reminders.
Time to breathe
For today, perhaps this enough. Two hours of dedicated writing, reading, journaling, and blogging. If it doesn’t feel good enough, perhaps it’s because “we grow, regress, get stuck, fragment, hide, and find ourselves over and over again,” and that’s all part of the progress.
Wishing you growth and rest, a room of your own, and the company of good souls. I’d love to hear what you’re working on, or not working on, or dreaming about. Thank you for reading, following, and commenting on my blog. Fondly, Lori
LakeArrowheadLadyWriter 
I am learning to breathe too… it’s hard!!! We came upon the crickets in our drive back from Colorado last summer. I thought it was a lot of Little Rock’s pebbles on road, then noticed they were moving!!! Googled it and discovered what they are!
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Hi, Kathy! You’re so right. I wonder why it’s hard, but I guess it’s just the nature of being human. We will keep at it!❤️ As for the crickets, God bless them, and help me to cope with them. 💞
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❤️ Love this one ☝🏻 mom. I think we all can benefit from taking moments to breathe and allow our ever stressed bodies to relax 🧘! It’s amazing how breathing techniques can be so calming. Such a simple thing; yet we have to be reminded to do it!
It’s a blessing to have a day like today, the opportunity to have another day and try again tomorrow. I’ve always admired your ability to turn the hardest of situations around into positives. To continue to work hard and move towards goals. Progress. Exactly. 👍🏻 I’m always amazed by your intelligence and your brilliant ability to write ✍🏻!
Love you to the moon!🌖❤️
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I love you forever, my beautiful girl. Thank you! You inspire me.
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A beautiful post!
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Thank you, GP. I truly appreciate your time and kind response!
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Hi Lori! I’m working on reviewing publisher edits to my short story collection, due out this fall. So cool to see it coming together. It’s beginning to seem real. Thank you for your thoughts.
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Hi, Marie! So happy to hear you have a story collection coming out! That’s a great achievement! I will keep following your blog and watch for updates!
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The crickets effect everything around you, nicely done, keep on writing ✍️
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They do! Thanks so much!
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Dear Mary, Your response is so warm and sincere and deeply meaningful, as you are yourself. I love that you are doing so well and that you are finding the joy inside your heart and soul that everyone who knows you has always felt for you! I was the introvert and you my charming friend! Love you always! Write more! You are so good at it!
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My early morning routine:
I write. I write. I write.
I hate it. I hate it. I hate it.
I live it. I live it. I live it, and. . . Still hate it. Hate it. . .
Until I love it. Gloria.
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Hi, Gloria! So glad you told me you were having trouble posting on my blog. I checked and found your lovely comment in my spam folder. You are definitely not spam! Love you! Thanks for sharing your early morning routine and for making sure that I (and other readers) got to see it!
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Hello there. I enjoyed your essay. I’d say that each day is a new journey in a way, though our likes and dislikes and inclinations and emotional makeups keep us within repeating patterns for the most part. Anyway, have a good day! Neil S.
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Hi, Neil. I agree with you! We do maintain a lot of our own patterns and routines much of the time. Some of those are so comforting! Have a great day!
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definitely querying is no fun – sending you misery loves company commiseration, friend 🙂
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I adore you, da-AL! You are the best, and I’ll be your misery loves company buddy and then your let’s celebrate buddy, too! 💐🌹💐
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yes 🥰
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