Category Archives: Uncategorized

October 6, 2026 · 4:49 pm

Wild Horses

Photograph by Yva Momatiuk & John Eastcott, “Mustangs on the Move” *Smithsonian*, November 1997

Last Sunday, in honor of St. Francis of Assisi and because it was Holy Trinity Episcopal Church’s and the Almost Home Animal Shelter’s annual Blessing of the Animals Day, we sang a song in church, “All Things Bright and Beautiful.” The song “is an Anglican hymn, also sung in many other Christian denominations. The words are by Cecil Frances Alexander and were first published in her Hymns for Little Children of 1848.” All Things Bright and Beautiful – Wikipedia.

*Scout and Gremlin, our own wild kittens of Nevada now domesticated in the U.P. I couldn’t help but notice the similarity to the Mustangs. (: My photo.*

Not having been reared by churchgoers, my first reference to these words came from the wonderful James Herriot books I read as a teen, beginning with All Creatures Great and Small. Later, I learned there was a song. Yes, I was woefully undereducated! Anyway, after church I couldn’t stop thinking about the song, and about all the beautiful things in the world, and I went online to listen to various versions.

And then my mind and heart and writer’s brain led me back to Nevada, a state where I lived briefly as a child and then again from the autumn of 2020 until the spring of 2026, a state filled with many things bright and beautiful.

Living in Nevada, I often saw wild horses. I will never forget my first sight of them, a band of maybe nine or ten, their glossy dark flanks shining in the sun, tails and manes flying as they raced along the edge of the Truckee River down in the canyon below the freeway. I was on my way to my new home, still a part of the crowd of humans in the vehicles speeding away from Reno, going on to our disparate destinations, while just below, past a short guardrail and down a steep embankment, water sparkled, aspens glowed golden in the autumn sun, and the mustangs ran, as if in another world, a parallel universe. I was awestruck.

I moved to a remote area, far away from any freeway, and spotting wild horses became more familiar, though I would never call it common. The sight of them always caught me, tugged at me, seemed sacred. Yet, I soon learned that these horses are not entirely free. A number of them are rounded up by the Bureau of Land Management each year in an effort, according to the BLM, “to protect the health of the animals and health of our nation’s public rangelands. In some locations, the BLM also uses birth control to slow the growth of wild horse herds. Absent management and natural predators, wild horse herds can double in just 4-5 years and quickly outgrow the ability of the land to support them” Nevada – Gathers & Removals | Bureau of Land Management.

According to The Cloud Foundation, a Colorado non-profit that aims to protect wild herds, The BLM’s 2026 roundup plan targeted 14,830 wild horses and burros for removal, The Cloud Foundation. What happens during and after these roundups is beyond my ability to describe. There are many good sources of information on this topic online and through libraries. What I at first saw as a kindness to the animals I eventually came to see as something much more complex, and even, in its execution and outcome, cruel. I do not claim expertise.

Additionally, I learned that wild horses were not universally revered. Because I regarded them with awe, I expected everyone else would, too. Sort of like when a group of people are gathered together on a beach at sunset, you just assume everyone there appreciates the beautiful display in some similar fashion to the way you do. That’s why they are all taking pictures, right? It seems universal.

I suppose I should have known better, but I am often taken by surprise. I was absolutely stunned to learn that some people, people who loved the wild and lightly populated land of central Nevada—probably more than I as a newcomer ever could–did not see the breathtaking beauty of the wild horses, but instead saw “trash” animals, “no good for anything.” Or so I was told by an old cowboy not long after I arrived. I don’t know if his was a widely held opinion in the area. Frankly, that conversation so saddened me that I didn’t want to know.

I did some reading and came to the conclusion that, in this, as in so many other aspects, humanity is capable of great love, and also of perfect disdain. While some people care deeply about wildlife, others either take it for granted, see it as a hindrance, want to own it, dominate it, tame it, eat it, turn it into a trophy—or even downright despise it. I don’t understand it, don’t have the perspective needed to grasp it, because, some might say, I’ve never had to compete with another creature for land or food or water. Maybe that’s it. I don’t know.

When it comes to wild horses, I still wonder how anyone could not care about such gorgeous creatures, creatures whose only wish is to live? What other value do they need? What value does any creature need? The horse, the bear, the deer, the eagle, the salmon? And what value do flowers need? Or trees?

Sometimes life hurts. You may see the beauty around you with clear eyes, and that sustains you. I hope you do. Usually, these days, for me, that means noticing the splendor of nature. It is in nature that I seek solace, and also renewal. You may appreciate the beauty you find in nature, or in your child’s eyes, or in a piece of music, or a work of art, and revere it—yet still, you weep as I have. And sometimes, it is beauty itself that sparks the weeping. For me, today as I write this, the beauty I weep for is the beauty of the horses.

Here is a link to one of the Tabernacle Choir’s performances of “All Things Bright and Beautiful.” I hope you enjoy it.

And the lyrics:

All things bright and beautiful,
All creatures great and small,
All things wise and wonderful,
The Lord God made them all.

Each little flower that opens,
Each little bird that sings,
He made their glowing colours,
He made their tiny wings.

The rich man in his castle,
The poor man at his gate,
God made them, high or lowly,
And ordered their estate.

The purple-headed mountain,
The river running by,
The sunset and the morning,
That brightens up the sky.

The cold wind in the winter,
The pleasant summer sun,
The ripe fruits in the garden,−
He made them every one:

The tall trees in the greenwood,
The meadows where we play,
The rushes by the water,
We gather every day;−

He gave us eyes to see them,
And lips that we might tell,
How great is God Almighty,
Who has made all things well.

All things bright …

(Amen)

The United Church of Canada includes a fourth verse:^[14]

The rocky mountain splendour,
The lone wolf’s haunting call,
The Great Lakes and the prairies,
The forest in the fall.

And here I am back in The Great Lakes, in the forest, in the fall.

Thank you, Lord God, for them all.

43 Comments

Filed under Gratitude, Nature, Personal History, Preservation, Uncategorized, Wildlife, Worship

Tagged as All Things Bright and Beautiful, animals, Horses, Nature, Nevada, photography, St. Francis of Assisi, Writing

September 3, 2026 · 5:15 pm

Warm Summer Sun and Many Golden Days

Warm Summer Sun

Mark Twain

Warm summer sun,

Shine kindly here,

Warm summer wind,

Blow softly here.

Green sod above,

Lie light, lie light.

Good night, dear heart,

Good night, Good night.

August 2026. Because no one ever promised me a rose garden, I am not surprised that I do not have one. I am incredibly lucky, I know, to have a house. A roof over my head. A husband who loves me. It’s involved a lot of work and a lot of moving and some really tough choices, but we have a century old home and we own it outright. It’s what’s called a fixer-upper, but it’s in a charming neighborhood in a nice town in a beautiful part of the country.

This home doesn’t have a rose garden, but it does have a small yard with five trees: a pine, a crabapple, a maple, a walnut and an ash, and for those I am very grateful. This matters because life without an abundance of trees makes me sad.

I think I was born knowing this, that I needed trees, but I haven’t always been able to live in a forest. Sometimes, though, I have. I’ve lived among the branches, crowns, needles, and leaves of thousands of trees, as in the San Bernardino Mountains of Southern California where the trees literally grew through the deck of the house and rubbed against its sides during storms. I lived amid towering pine and oak forests, watching the squirrels argue with the Stellar Jays. Chattering, flying balls of fur and haughty blue-winged overseers fighting it out for the choicest acorns. In Southern Wisconsin, I lived in boggy woods nestled around the Fox River, heaping piles of autumn leaves burning in all the yards in November, ears tuned to the haunting calls of owls at night and eyes searching for the bright scarlet wings of the cardinals, ears hearing their sweet duets—cheer, cheer, cheer!

I’ve lived in other places that I loved, but found that the number of trees in proximity needed to be at a fairly high ratio compared to the number of dwellings for me to . . . what? Breathe properly? Yes, to breathe. Something close to that anyway.

Here in our new/old home in Michigan, in the glorious Upper Peninsula, we originally had three more trees than currently. Sadly, this was only for the first couple of weeks we owned the house. They were beautiful old pines, but we had to have them removed when we moved in and discovered that all the plumbing needed to be replaced inside the house, along with the sewer line that leads down to the street. This necessitated having those trees removed, half of the yard dug out, and then once everything was redone, a truckload of dirt brought back in and that half of the yard reseeded.

This also necessitated the emptying of our savings account (please don’t ask about why we had no other recourse…). Also, some extremely dear friends helped us with the final expense for all of that. There is no adequate or even semi-adequate way of expressing our gratitude for our friends. You know who you are and I hope you know how much you are loved. And—anyway! Anyway!

When we purchased our house, both the structure itself and the yard had been neglected for quite some time—years—decades even. The house will no doubt be given more of a starring role in an upcoming post, but for now, since I am finally writing again and I seem to want to write about trees and plants, I will briefly describe the yard.

The garden consists of a couple of small areas near the house where my husband and I managed to put in a few plants when we moved here this spring: two small Japanese willows, a lavender and a sumac. Money was very tight (think sewer), so we didn’t even try for an annual garden nor any vegetables. Frankly, it was a money issue and a “first the house has to livable” issue. Next spring, we’re hoping to plant more.

Deer are not lavender lovers, and since sumac grows wildly all over the Midwest as far as I know, I didn’t think it would attract them either. I wanted something that would be colorful in the autumn. I was pretty sure the delicate looking willows would look tasty to wildlife, but I chose them anyway. They were small and inexpensive.

Sure, we knew deer might be a problem, but we adopted the “wait and see” approach. Some neighbors had shrubs and flowers, not as many as could easily have been grown in such lush soil and usually ample rainfall, but still, there were baskets of flowers and ferns hanging on most of the porches and a few manicured beds. On closer inspection, we noticed various deer deterrent devices throughout the area.

We caged the willows and sumac after the first night when they were nearly totally consumed by a few of our local white-tailed deer. The required wire fencing and stakes cost more than the plants, and naturally, they are not as attractive now that they are nubs shrouded by fencing.

Photo by Andrew Patrick Photo on Pexels.com

The deer are worth it though. They are so beautiful. Life goes on, and we do our best.

Sometimes, when the days feel heavy and colorless, bleak and hot, I cannot summon the courage to write. That doesn’t mean I lose the longing for beauty and comfort during the long hot days of summer, it just means I have to dig down a little farther into the cooler depths where the roots still rest and strive, into a quieter place than the garden above. This has been that kind of a summer. A quiet time of long walks, house painting, reading, and waiting to hear from my publisher. A time of burrowing in, fortifying, growing roots. Hoping that the time spent walking in the woods, the time spent immersed in the compelling work of other writers, the time spent repairing this old house is time spent on growing a new kind of garden. The right garden for us to live in now, here in Michigan, at this time in our lives.

These are the wonderful books that have been filling my head and heart lately:

A Piece of the World by Christina Baker Kline. I loved this book! I am still thinking about it for a week after finishing it.

When the Cranes Fly South by Lisa Ridzen.

The Diamond Eye by Kate Quinn

Tom Lake by Ann Patchett

I See you’ve Called in Dead by John Kenney

The Missing Pages by Alyson Richman

The Mad Wife by Meagan Church

Just for fun: The Villa by Rachel Hawkins

Just started: The Briar Club by Kate Quinn

*Newly painted and curtained dining area. My photo.*

And now, Welcome, Welcome to September!

A Month of Change and New Possibilities!

*Some other things I’ve been reading. My photo.*

Wishing you all wonderful days

and

plenty of the things that matter most to you!

Lucy Maud Montgomery, ‘September’.

Lo! a ripe sheaf of many golden days
Gleaned by the year in autumn’s harvest ways,
With here and there, blood-tinted as an ember,
Some crimson poppy of a late delight
Atoning in its splendor for the flight
Of summer blooms and joys
This is September.

62 Comments

Filed under Authors, Books, Fiction, HIstorical Fiction, Home, Identity, Literary Fiction, Nature, Personal History, Publishing, Reading, Seasons, Uncategorized, Writing

Tagged as Book Review, Fiction, flowers, garden, gardening, Moving, Nature, plants, Writing

August 6, 2026 · 6:26 pm

Book Review: Glimpses, Grandfather’s Life During World War II by Stephanie Peirce

**A Priceless and Precious Piece of World War II History**

I have had the privilege of friendship with the talented poet, Stephanie Peirce for some years now. We met at Goddard College where we were both pursuing our MFAs in creative writing, Stephanie as an aspiring poet and I as a writer of novel length fiction. It was love at first sight (for me anyway!) when I sat in on a poetry group she was in. She was, I fancied, a younger and more talented version of me. We both had the same long, wild mass of hair, though mine was beginning to silver by then and hers was golden. Somehow, though we were on different paths and didn’t see much of each other at school, we began a long distance friendship after graduation, checking in on each other’s writing journey and eventually serving as reader-editors for one another’s manuscripts.

Glimpses is Stephanie’s newest achievement, and it is wonderful! I recommend it heartily, and I am so proud to introduce you to it here.

Glimpses: Grandfather’s Life During World War II | Barnes & Noble®

Glimpses is a slim volume of letters, photos, and commentary that offers precious glimpses into the lives of the author’s paternal grandparents, Catherine “Treenie” Barham Peirce and Chichester “Chit” Tapscott Peirce Jr., who was killed in Germany on February 9, 1945. It tells a compelling story of love and loss, one that is carefully compiled and beautifully rendered. It is an absolute treasure, a gift not only to the memories of Stephanie’s grandparents, but also to the countless lives altered by World War II, and to readers and historians everywhere.

*Glimpses* will fit perfectly on this shelf!

Stephanie’s first book of poetry, *The Bright Dark*

Wishing you all ample time to read, to write, to dream and to create–and beautiful friends to share it all with. Love, Lori

34 Comments

Filed under Authors, Books, Commentary, Nonfiction, Reading, Relationship, The Greatest Generation, Uncategorized, World War II

Tagged as Book Review, Books, Family, Friendship, poems, poetry, Writing

July 11, 2026 · 2:00 pm

Strength, Survival, Sharks, An Apology, and A Lot of Birthday Cake

I recently had one of those decade milestone birthdays. I am not an enormous fan of birthday celebrations in general, and less so when I am the one in the spotlight. I can’t remember ever being excited about my own birthday, at least not in the way I imagine other people get excited. I guess I really don’t know if other people are truly excited on their birthdays or if it is all performative theatre. Maybe some of each? I know I get embarrassed, especially when I open presents in front of people. I feel like I’m going to let them down in some undefinable way.

My first memory of my own birthday was when I was very young—perhaps three? Definitely no more than four. I was a shy little kid who liked to be alone and sleep a lot. Who knows why. As far as I know things hadn’t yet fallen apart in my world at that point, so I don’t think I was depressed per se. Though disaster was looming, no one knew that yet. Definitely not little Lori. So, I was just a little odd, I guess. Anyway, my older brother, Billy, was the sunny opposite—funny, excitable, energetic. Everything delighted him.

The thing I remember about that early birthday is being shaken out of the soft cocoon of sleep by Billy jumping up on my bed and hopping around whooping, “Sissy, sissy, wake up. It’s your birthday!” I am pretty sure he stepped on me during the process. I reacted the way a fifty-year-old spinster might, groaning and covering my head with my pillow and telling him to go away. It was a story often repeated in the family. Billy was more excited about Lori’s birthday than she was.

Over the years, birthdays never really got more exciting, except, perhaps, for the 18^th, because when I turned 18 it became legal for me to drink alcohol in the state of Wisconsin and I was, sadly, very interested in taverns in those days. I was a bit of a lost soul. By the time I turned 21, I was a mother, and so there was little reason or opportunity to celebrate my own birthday. I could instead focus on making birthdays memorable for my son, and then my daughter when she came along a few years later. I enjoyed making their cakes, choosing presents for them, planning little parties. I began taking my daughter to Disneyland every year on her birthday since we lived nearby at the time, and she continues to be a huge Disneyland fan to this day.

I think it was when I was in my late thirties that my friend Cheryl suggested we start a birthday tradition of meeting somewhere special to celebrate our milestone birthdays, the ones that ended in 0, and so it was that we went to Robert Redford’s Sundance Resort in Utah for our 40^th birthdays. We have been friends since we were little girls, and we are only a couple months apart. The once-a-decade birthday trip suited me. No big gatherings. No embarrassing surprises, just two old friends going for nature walks and eating nice food. Perfect!

This year I had three birthday celebrations! That’s a lot of cake! Not that a lot of cake is a bad thing. I had several days with my friend, Sandy, then several with my friend, Cheryl, and then a little visit with my sister-in-law, Kathy, and some of her family at her new home in Menominee, Michigan. It’s been wonderful. The only thing missing is my kids and grandkids who are far away. Spending time with them cannot come soon enough!

Birthdays can be a bit like New Year’s in a sense—a time to reflect on the past, celebrate, remember, and look forward—a time to plan ahead. My friends and family reminded me of the good things about reaching this milestone, of the experience and love, of pain, too, but also wisdom. Somehow, over the years I managed to raise two children, put myself through college and grad school, teach wonderful young people, and a few older ones, write several novels (and finally am in the process of getting the third one published), maintained rich and meaningful relationships (but also lost a few), and am experiencing now the joy of watching my beautiful grandchildren as they grow. A long life provides a kind of strength, a strength that recognizes the good, the bad, the hopelessness and the hopefulness—the totality of it all. And I have been all those things at one time or another.

I wish I could say I’ve put all my mistakes behind me, and that I have reached a state of peaceful benign bliss, but I definitely can’t! Just after priding myself on what I considered my valiant composure while under stress, and, in fact, bragging about it, my husband jumped into a swimming pool and got my hair wet. I lost my mind. I shot through the water like an angry shark, whipping and whacking water into his surprised face with an intensity never before seen outside of a hurricane. I was as surprised as he was! Where did that come from?

I guess I still have some growing up to do. I Am So Sorry, Sweetheart!

Sending Love and Blissful Blooms to You Today! And Birthday and UnBirthday Best Wishes Galore!

80 Comments

Filed under Aging, Identity, Personal History, Relationship, Uncategorized

Tagged as birthday, Birthdays, Family, life, Love, Milestones, Writing

June 17, 2026 · 6:02 pm

California Dreaming

*Lake Arrowhead, California, USA. Photo by Hayley O’Kelly*

“A writer finds peace in silence, speaking only to the page, yet the words survive only by stepping into the noise of the world to be seen, heard, and held by others.”
― Lawrence Nault

I have found a great deal of peace in the silent world of writing, “speaking only to the page.” First as an insecure and introverted girl, and later as an adult, writing has provided a safe place for me. A place of comfort and security, and a place to grow.

In my experience the act of writing places the writer in a sacred space both inside and outside of the constraints of normal consciousness. It’s also a place of discovery and healing. Writing has probably saved me from a thousand unknown terrible fates by keeping me grounded, probing, perceptive, and awake. At least it feels that way. Writing has awakened in me a million possibilities, become my friend, my coach, my inward eye. Writing has shaped my existence.

*An entry from my journal which was made from an old book owned by a lady named Mary Miller*

And so, it with great trepidation that I send my writing into the world. The tension between the safety of my personal writing bubble and the “noise of the world” is immense. Sending your manuscript out has been compared to sending your child to school for the first time (“Sending a book out into the world is a lot like sending your child to the first day of kindergarten. You hope the other kids play nice and that she makes friends”—Mitchell Zuckoff), and having a child has been compared to giving your heart away (“Making the decision to have a child – it is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body” ―Elizabeth Stone). These are apt descriptions of my state of mind as I wait to hear from my publisher.

The contract has been signed, and the editor will soon be digging into my manuscript. This stage feels surreal after a lifetime of reading, writing, studying and dreaming. And years of querying agents and publishers. There’s not much to tell yet, but it looks as though there will be a book with my name on it coming out at some undetermined date in the future. I’m guessing it will be many months from now. I don’t even know if the title I’ve chosen will be used. I can say this, it is a World War II homefront historical fiction novel. It’s set in Lake Arrowhead, California, USA. The protagonist is named Mary Miller. And there are bears.

Write what is in your heart. With love.

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Filed under Authors, Books, HIstorical Fiction, Identity, Publishing, Uncategorized, World War II, Writing

Tagged as California, Fiction, Lake Arrowhead, Writing

May 4, 2026 · 5:05 pm

Dayenu

One of my oldest friends called me last week. I’d been having a rough time and had withdrawn in a way that only a very close friend would recognize. I’d still been “in touch” with her, but I was withholding, and she could tell. She called, and I don’t remember exactly what she said, but her voice was soft and patient and expectant. She made it possible for me to reveal my heartache and gave me time to say the things out loud that I hadn’t been able to say.

Dr. Gerald Stein in his post, “Why the Clock is Essential in Therapy (and Relationships)” (https://drgeraldstein.wordpress.com), discusses that making time for “tender issues… can be like a dance, the partners move together as if choreographed…”, and that is what my friend did for me. She didn’t try to stop my tears or give me advice. It was like a dance in a way, or maybe like a prayer. Total acceptance and love.

After a while my breathing settled and we continued our conversation. She told me about “Dayenu,” the prayer and Passover seder song that tells the story of Exodus. The melody of the song is joyous and upbeat, a list of fifteen things God did for the Jews, anyone of which, they say, would have been enough for them. Sefaria Library’s reading of the text begins “How much good, layer upon layer, the omnipresent has done for us. Had He brought us out of Egypt without bringing judgment upon [our oppressors], that would have been enough for us.”

Traditional Seder Plate with Symbolic Foods for Passover- Pexels Free Photos

It would have been enough. Dayenu is a prayer of gratitude, but, she intimated (or perhaps I misunderstood and twisted it to suit my own situation), that sometimes the word Dayenu can also be used as a cleansing release. I don’t want to be disrespectful. But when I think of her saying “Dayenu! Enough!” I feel a little better.

Unlike my friend, I wasn’t raised in any specific faith. Though I believe my divorced parents were given religious instruction, I think my dad more than my mom, they did not, evidently, feel the need to share it with their progeny.

Why not? I’ve wondered. Parsing that is loose. My grandfathers died long before I was born, and one of my grandmothers died when I was a baby. The only grandparent I knew was my mom’s mom who died when I was nineteen. Sadly, I didn’t see her enough, nor know what to ask her about when I did. And for some reason, religion wasn’t much spoken of in my childhood, unless you took the Lord’s name in vain. That was frowned upon, unless Mom was really angry, in which case, she couldn’t be held to account. Dad never lost his temper and never cursed, so there wasn’t a lot of reason, I guess, for him to even bring up sin or religion or God. Anyway, Mom and Dad didn’t live together after I was four-years-old, so I would never be a member of a traditional united family like the ones I fantasized about.

Openverse, New York Public Library (Obviously I had very grand and old-fashioned fantasies about family life–I read a lot!)

I know Dad attended a Methodist church growing up in Chicago, and that his widowed librarian mother was a model of decorum, and that, in the 1920’s and ‘30s meant adherence to social norms such as church attendance. I’m not sure whether Mom was taken to church as a child, but given the times, I imagine she was at least exposed. Her upbringing was less city, less refined than Dad’s. Mom grew up in Faribault, Minnesota with a terminally ill father she adored, a Swedish immigrant who was bedridden by the time she was of school age, and her mother worked many hours a week to support the family. There were eight children, but by the time Mom came along several of them had left home. It wasn’t a farm, so it wasn’t as if the siblings had a reason to stay once they reached maturity, though I believe several of her older brothers helped contribute to the family income.

Both of my grandmothers worked outside the home, which I used to think was somewhat unusual, but now I know women have always worked in all kinds of ways other than homemaking. It just didn’t get reported. Women’s contributions have always been underrepresented in American society. For me, born in the 1950s and growing up in the 1960s and early 70s, it was normal to think that women had always been home. I grew up watching The Donna Reid Show, I Love Lucy and Leave it to Beaver. Sitcoms regularly featured women as married and caring for husbands and children, even if the woman happened to be a witch, as in Samantha of Bewitched. It was the ideal. Only a rare few Katherine Hepburn types, charming enough, but come on, not really practical, lived independent lives or made money of their own. That’s what we were told. I mean neither of my grandmothers was even allowed to vote when they were young, but they were allowed to work to support their families.

Dad’s father, a Scottish immigrant, died when Dad was four. Dad’s only sibling died at age twelve, and his spinster aunt, a seamstress, lived with them, bringing in an extra bit of income and caring for my dad (now an only child) while his mother worked, so even though it was the Great Depression and the family had experienced horrible loss, between his mother and his aunt, things stayed afloat. Dad was well looked after, educated, participated in church and school activities, and was enrolled in a pre-med program at college before WWII changed everything. Mom, on the other hand, didn’t, couldn’t, get the same amount of attention and help. When would her mother who cooked and cleaned and cared for other people and other people’s children probably for most of the day and most of the night, day after day without reprieve have had the time to take my mom to church?

Mom didn’t talk about it. Both of my parents claimed to believe in God and considered themselves Christian, and I believed them, but it was sort of incidental. God was why you didn’t lie or cheat or hurt others. Jesus was why we had Christmas and Easter. Despite their professed faith, both of them shunned churches and had little good to say about people who attended them. Organized religion, Dad said, had caused most of the world’s problems. Mom was less philosophical. She just didn’t care for their “holier than thou” ways. I was left to find my own path if I so desired, but was never given any formal, or indeed informal, religious education.

It took me a long time, with a lot of detours, to begin to travel my own spiritual path, and I haven’t been exactly good at it, but in my own halting way I’ve touched—not held, but touched, fragments of comfort, peace, and wonder over the years. The ways grace arrived for me are varied. A Lutheran friend. A Jewish friend. A Latter-Day Saints friend. A longing to give something lasting to my children. A church bell, and then another, and another. Calls to worship. Two Presbyterian congregations, one large and one small. One Episcopal congregation, tiny. A community where different faiths worked together. Health scares. Reading. Love. All of these. And Prayer. Something I always did, instinctively. Prayer.

I was surprised to find handwritten prayers in Dad’s bedside table drawer when he died. A nightly prayer list, it appeared. All beautifully written, eloquently phrased personal prayers for me and my brother and our families.

So Dad prayed, too, more than I knew.

Perhaps that was enough.

Thank you for reading, and my hopes for you today are these—may you have enough friendship, enough time, and the opportunity to grow in love and joy in all the ways that fill you.

“Fragonard, Reader Jean-Honoré Fragonard“/ CC0 1.0

Here is a link to a performance of “Dayenu” from Park Avenue Synagogue: Cantors Trio: Dayenu (Passover Song)

And here are the lyrics in Hebrew and English from from Sefaria Library at http://www.sefaria.org:

אִלּוּ הוֹצִיאָנוּ מִמִצְרַיִם וְלֹא עָשָׂה בָהֶם שְׁפָטִים, דַּיֵּנוּ

Magid, Dayenu

כַּמָה מַעֲלוֹת טוֹבוֹת לַמָּקוֹם עָלֵינוּ!

כַּמָּה מַעֲלוֹת טוֹבוֹת HOW MUCH GOOD,
LAYER UPON LAYER,
THE OMNIPRESENT HAS DONE FOR US:

אִלּוּ הוֹצִיאָנוּ מִמִּצְרַיִם וְלֹא עָשָׂה בָהֶם שְׁפָטִים, דַּיֵּנוּ.

Had He brought us out of Egypt
without bringing judgment upon
[our oppressors],
that would have been enough for us.

אִלּוּ עָשָׂה בָהֶם שְׁפָטִים, וְלֹא עָשָׂה בֵאלֹהֵיהֶם, דַּיֵּנוּ.

Had He brought judgment upon them
but not upon their gods,
that would have been enough for us.

אִלּוּ עָשָׂה בֵאלֹהֵיהֶם, וְלֹא הָרַג אֶת־בְּכוֹרֵיהֶם, דַּיֵּנוּ.

Had He brought judgment upon their gods
without killing their firstborn sons,
that would have been enough for us.

אִלּוּ הָרַג אֶת־בְּכוֹרֵיהֶם וְלֹא נָתַן לָנוּ אֶת־מָמוֹנָם, דַּיֵּנוּ.

Had He killed their firstborn sons
without giving us their wealth,
that would have been enough for us.

אִלּוּ נָתַן לָנוּ אֶת־מָמוֹנָם וְלֹא קָרַע לָנוּ אֶת־הַיָּם, דַּיֵּנוּ.

Had He given us their wealth
without splitting the sea for us,
that would have been enough for us.

אִלּוּ קָרַע לָנוּ אֶת־הַיָּם וְלֹא הֶעֱבִירָנוּ בְתוֹכוֹ בֶּחָרָבָה, דַּיֵּנוּ.

Had He split the sea for us
but not brought us through it dry,
that would have been enough for us.

אִלּוּ הֶעֱבִירָנוּ בְתוֹכוֹ בֶּחָרָבָה וְלֹא שִׁקַּע צָרֵנוּ בְתוֹכוֹ דַּיֵּנוּ.

Had He brought us through [the sea] dry
without drowning our enemies in it,
that would have been enough for us.

אִלּוּ שִׁקַּע צָרֵנוּ בְתוֹכוֹ וְלֹא סִפֵּק צָרְכֵּנוּ בַּמִדְבָּר אַרְבָּעִים שָׁנָה דַּיֵּנוּ.

Had He drowned our enemies in it
without providing for our needs
for forty years in the desert,
that would have been enough for us.

אִלּוּ סִפֵּק צָרְכֵּנוּ בַּמִּדְבָּר אַרְבָּעִים שָׁנָה וְלֹא הֶאֱכִילָנוּ אֶת־הַמָּן דַּיֵּנוּ.

Had He provided for our needs
for forty years in the desert,
without feeding us with manna,
that would have been enough for us.

אִלּוּ הֶאֱכִילָנוּ אֶת־הַמָּן וְלֹא נָתַן לָנוּ אֶת־הַשַּׁבָּת, דַּיֵּנוּ.

Had He fed us with manna
without giving us Shabbat,
that would have been enough for us.

אִלּוּ נָתַן לָנוּ אֶת־הַשַּׁבָּת, וְלֹא קֵרְבָנוּ לִפְנֵי הַר סִינַי, דַּיֵּנוּ.

Had He given us Shabbat
without drawing us close
around Mount Sinai,
that would have been enough for us.

אִלּוּ קֵרְבָנוּ לִפְנֵי הַר סִינַי, וְלא נָתַן לָנוּ אֶת־הַתּוֹרָה. דַּיֵּנוּ.

Had He drawn us close around Mount Sinai
without giving us the Torah,
that would have been enough for us.

אִלּוּ נָתַן לָנוּ אֶת־הַתּוֹרָה וְלֹא הִכְנִיסָנוּ לְאֶרֶץ יִשְׂרָאֵל, דַּיֵּנוּ.

Had He given us the Torah
without bringing us to the land of Israel,
that would have been enough for us.

אִלּוּ הִכְנִיסָנוּ לְאֶרֶץ יִשְׂרָאֵל וְלֹא בָנָה לָּנוּ אֶת־בֵּית הַבְּחִירָה דַּיֵּנוּ.

Had He brought us to the land of Israel
without building for us
the House He chose
that would have been enough for us.

עַל אַחַת, כַּמָה וְכַמָה, טוֹבָה כְפוּלָה וּמְכֻפֶּלֶת לַמָּקוֹם עָלֵינוּ: שֶׁהוֹצִיאָנוּ מִמִּצְרַיִם, וְעָשָׂה בָהֶם שְׁפָטִים, וְעָשָׂה בֵאלֹהֵיהֶם, וְהָרַג אֶת־בְּכוֹרֵיהֶם, וְנָתַן לָנוּ אֶת־מָמוֹנָם, וְקָרַע לָנוּ אֶת־הַיָּם, וְהֶעֱבִירָנוּ בְתוֹכוֹ בֶּחָרָבָה, וְשִׁקַּע צָרֵנוּ בְתוֹכוֹ, וְסִפֵּק צָרְכֵּנוּ בַּמִדְבָּר אַרְבָּעִים שָׁנָה, וְהֶאֱכִילָנוּ אֶת־הַמָּן, וְנָתַן לָנוּ אֶת־הַשַּׁבָּת, וְקֵרְבָנוּ לִפְנֵי הַר סִינַי, וְנָתַן לָנוּ אֶת־הַתּוֹרָה, וְהִכְנִיסָנוּ לְאֶרֶץ יִשְׂרָאֵל, וּבָנָה לָּנוּ אֶת־בֵּית הַבְּחִירָה לְכַפֵּר עַל־כָּל־עֲוֹנוֹתֵינוּ.

59 Comments

Filed under Family, Personal History, Reading, Relationship, Uncategorized, Work

Tagged as Faith, Friendship, Gratitude, Healing, Listening, Time

March 27, 2026 · 2:35 pm

Books Get Me Through The Great Alone

It’s been two weeks since I left Nevada and one week since I arrived at my new Michigan home. All of these days have been solo; I drove alone, I arrived alone to an empty house, I spend my days here alone. There’s a theme building . . . For now!

But husband and kitties will be joining me soon.

As an introvert, this hasn’t been particularly tough. I love people, but I also love solitude. I just got the internet yesterday, and that’s fun because now I can write and publish my writing more easily. No TV here yet. No furniture to speak of. I have one little lamp table that fit in my car, a folding camp chair, and a cot. That’s it. Everything else will come in the moving van next week. So, what do I do all day?

I clean and I read. Often, at the same time, by listening to audiobooks using the Libby library App. One of the books I’ve enjoyed so far during this extended period of solitude is aptly The Great Alone by Kristin Hannah. It’s a tough book about a tough time and a tough place, but I liked it. Alaska in the 1970s, mental illness, abuse . . . it’s got it all, but it isn’t only that, of course. It’s also a book filled with nostalgia, love, and the awesomeness of nature.

Other books I read either just prior to moving, during the drive, or since my arrival are: We All Live Here, Moyes; Sandwich, Newman; The Secret Book of Flora Lea, Henry; Remain, Spark and Shyamalan; The Missing Half, Flowers and Kiester; and currently, The Island of Sea Women, See. Each book has its merits.

I found both We All Live Here and Sandwich charming and humorous. Both are light, contemporary novels with women protagonists wrestling with life changing events and the love of family.

The Secret Book of Flora Lea took me to one of my favorite historical settings, World War II England, in the countryside and also to London in the 1960s. It’s a delightful book about sisters, families, love, and the importance of stories.

Remain and The Missing Half are mysteries, with Remain being the more entertaining of the two for me. The Missing Half helped pass the time, but Remain’s ghostly love story captivated me at times, including during several memorable scenes that made me shiver.

And now I’m listening to The Island of Sea Women. It’s taken me to a part of the world I know very little about, which I love, because I am learning so much. It’s set in Korea from the story’s beginning in the 1930s and will move through the war years and take me to the present day. It’s about women sea divers (an amazing group of female divers who earn the money for their families while their husbands care for the children), and it’s the story of two friends Mi-ja and Young-sook.

As you can see, I’ve not been alone, not really, for I’ve been traveling through time and place along with the characters created by the authors of these varied and appealing novels, carried away by their stories. It’s a kind of magic really, the way a reader lives both inside and outside of a book—simultaneously in the room, and also somewhere else far away.

I love this line about reading from Stephen Chbosky from his young adult novel, The Perks of Being a Wallflower:

“Sometimes, I read a book, and I think I am the people in the book.”

Exactly.

63 Comments

Filed under Authors, Books, Commentary, Fiction, HIstorical Fiction, Home, Identity, Literary Fiction, Nature, Personal History, Reading, Uncategorized, Winter, World War II

Tagged as Book Review, Books, Fiction, Introvert, Michigan, Moving, Nevada, Reading, Writing

March 13, 2026 · 1:54 pm

Dreamy Forest Music and Afternoon Spritzers

*My Family Spelling of the Name Has an “E” at the End: Johnstone. (candle/ image courtesy of scotstee.com)*

Welcome to Billings, Montana, where I have hunkered down to avoid driving on the Interstate during one of the many reported snowstorms traveling around the US of late. If I had planned better, I would have chosen a cozier hotel to get stuck in, and I would have paid attention to where my husband stored the ice scraper in my fully packed Jeep, and I would have brought socks. And I should have planned better because Nunquam Non Paratus—Never Not Prepared—is the ancient motto of my family. I was raised under the plaid and the crest and the motto, yet here I am, sockless in Billings, Montana (not exactly sockless, but the pair I had on when I left Austin, Nevada several days ago needs a good washing, which I will give it, in the sink with my tiny bottle of shampoo. That might mean I’m a little bit prepared).

I haven’t driven much since moving to Austin over five years ago, as it is a compact town and I could walk to my part-time library job and to my beautiful historic church. Also, my guy always drives when we go “to town” to get groceries and supplies in Fallon, a mere 112 miles away. Ah, the open road!

As I mentioned in an earlier post though, Mr. P and I have sold our home in Austin and we’re moving to Michigan. Hence my solo interstate journey. Mr. P and his heroic childhood friend will be coming soon with the moving van, but they will be driving tandem (?), I guess, taking turns sleeping and driving and only stopping for gas and food. I left earlier because I am the world’s slowest driver, and I refuse to drive after dark when everything goes all fuzzy and weird, and also, I am not a morning person. So, I don’t get too far within the slow-motion window of light between say, 11 AM and 6 PM (this time of year).

*The Kitties Will Be Coming to Michigan Soon!*

It was a deeply emotional parting, my leaving Austin. There were library patron visits, homemade cards and cookies, a sumptuous church luncheon, and these amazing gifts (I’m keeping names private as I haven’t asked permission to share):

*Book Quilt Made by Dear Friends*, My photo

*Saint George’s Episcopal Church Original Painting by Dear Friend*

*Austin Library Original Painting by Dear Friend*

*A Special Friend Luncheon in Fallon, NV*

And now we’ve arrived at the Dreamy Forest Music and Afternoon Spritzers portion of the post, which is a radio station and a white wine spritzer in a plastic glass, but it is lovely, and I feel loved, and safe, and scared and excited all at the same time, because I have left a wondrous place, and I’m off to a new unknown. Wish me luck?

Thanks for the Memories! Remember Bob Hope singing that? It always moistens the eyes. We are all so lucky, you know, to have each other and love each other for as long and as well as we can.

Be well everyone, and safe! I am so grateful for your visit. Where are you, in this wild, wild, harsh and beautiful, sweet and mixed-up world? I’d love to hear about it!

61 Comments

Filed under Travel, Uncategorized

Tagged as Friends, Michigan, Moving, Nevada, Road Trip, Scottish Clans

January 17, 2026 · 3:31 pm

Repost from Jill Badonsky on Substack – Lovely!

open.substack.com/pub/jillbadonsky/p/birds-flowers-clouds

2 Comments

Filed under Uncategorized

December 31, 2025 · 5:30 pm

This Writing Life and Query Tracker

Why We Write

“You should write because you love the shape of stories and sentences and the creation of different words on a page. Writing comes from reading, and reading is the finest teacher of how to write.” ― Annie Proulx

“Fill your paper with the breathings of your heart.” ― William Wordsworth

“One of the few things I know about writing is this: spend it all, shoot it, play it, lose it, all, right away, every time. Do not hoard what seems good for a later place in the book, or for another book; give it, give it all, give it now. The impulse to save something good for a better place later is the signal to send it now. Something more will arise for later, something better. These things fill from behind, from beneath, like well water. Similarly, the impulse to keep to yourself what you have learned is not only shameful, it is destructive. Anything you do not give freely and abundantly becomes lost to you. You open your safe and find ashes.” -Annie Dillard

How We Manage Our Writing

One way I manage my writing is with the free online Query Tracker (QT) service, which makes it easy for writers to search for literary agents. I love that I can narrow my search to suit my particular manuscript—by genre and length—and also by providing links to the agents’ respective agencies, where I can read extensively about the agency itself, what authors it represents, and much more. Locating an updated list of literary agents currently accepting queries and providing an organized space to keep track of who I submit to and when is immediately helpful.

Have you used Query Tracker? I’ve been using it for several years now, and I find it very useful. In the beginning I used it to research agents, looking for professionals who represented my genre of fiction. Gradually, I felt ready to send out queries and began the laborious process. I also keep a paper file where I jot down notes about the various agents’ manuscript wish lists and guidelines, as well as the dates I submitted to them. That is my messy but personalized backup, and I intend to continue the practice, but it’s also extremely helpful to use the free online Query Tracker.

Over time, I’ve found that I also greatly appreciate the features for recording the date I get a response (if ever), and the type of response. Agents request different content. Some accept only a query letter. Some want a certain number of sample pages along with the query (the number of pages varies). Some request a synopsis. Most of them have a loosely specified timeline given for responding to queries, with many of them stating that if you don’t hear from them within that time frame, it counts as a pass on your manuscript. If you get a response asking for more pages, or the full manuscript (Hallelujah!), there’s a place on QT for you to record that information as well. You can organize the submission chart alphabetically by agent or agency or by date submitted. This is just a quick overview.

In my case, after sending out over 80 deeply researched and personally tailored queries to agents, with a couple of requests for more material that sadly didn’t bring an offer of representation, I went back to the drawing board. I revised the manuscript again on my own and then had the whole thing professionally edited. That accomplished, I felt ready to start submitting again, but this time I decided to submit the manuscript to small publishers that accept submissions without agent representation. I’ve read there is a better chance of getting traditionally published going this route.

Query Tracker has a search engine for publishers as well, so it was easy for me to search for publishers, again by genre and length, to research those who published my genre, and to begin submitting again. Currently I have 7 submissions out with these small presses, one of which contacted me within a few days. It’s currently under review there, but it could be some time before I hear anything, so I’m keeping the other submissions out there, and will continue sending out more.

It’s still early days in this process, but with the new year just hours away, I’m energized about new possibilities! I’d love to hear about your writing life journey—not only the path to publishing, but about all aspects of this beautifully messy creative life we share. With Love!